What? Alone? I've never been alone. Just ask Kligrun, the laser-shooting dinosaur sitting right next to me.

Deadlines, limits, strict guidelines, and pop-up ads.

Dagon the Missing Link, for the upcoming 2009 animated movie "Monsters vs. Aliens" from Dreamworks Pictures.  It's going to be an out of this world family fun time experience!!1!

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..i just did...

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:O

When I read the questions and reflections from Gaia.... they're just so... reflective....

After trying to think up a logical summary of what Earth said to me, I simply decided to write down the conversation word for word:

Me: Gaia told me to write about what you tell me, so what do you tell me?

Earth: What? Oh, dude, you mind grabbing me some more compost, some trees, and a beer before you sit down?

Me: Sure thing... so whatsup?

Earth: Pfft... Life's a bitch, man... I have to go around with a horrible fever, while some douchebags keep thinking up these bullshit ideas about controlling me and how they have to fight over me for the sake of "peace".  And have you seen the NEWS?  I'm fucking dying here and that one "government", uh... the US right?... Well, they're worrying about who's gonna be the top douchebag by the time I'm done running around the sun for the 4.5 BILLIONTH FUCKING TIME!!! Breathes heavily. Hurricane season starts

Me: Chill down dude... uh... yes I realize the double meaning in what I just said... but anyways I gotta be going, since I gotta keep the answer short so I don't bore the readers... uh... you alright?

Earth: In the middle of an emotional breakdown, sobbing. I'm hopeless... my brother... lost all his life... now he's dry and red... my sister... she's always been to thick... she never made it... I'm getting killed... and I didn't even ask for this... Puts his head on his knees.  Global economy goes to shit.

I leave, with a mental note that I must stop at Walgreens and get him a Get Well Soon card or something

I take it out every Saturday and, at least once a month, take it to a fine restaurant -- they're super expensive, but it deserves it and it gives me a buffer for when it gets moody (guys know what I'm talkin 'bout, right? ;D).  Oh, and once, I made it a mixed cd with a bunch of songs that show my feelings for Earth.  Yea, that's about it... me and Earth have a healthy relationship.

This guy sitting in front of a monitor at an underground warehouse in Arlington through a tiny camera hidden in my lava lamp and a microphone glued behind the poster on the wall.... It's for the safety of our nation... I might just be a terrorist, you know.

The fact that I wrote this sentence with just eleven words.

I could care less about pop-up ads. Period.